If I don't want to find religion, does that mean God doesn't want me to find him?

If God has made me in such a way that I not only feel no need for religion, but actually feel oddly threatened by the concept, does the fact that God presumably made me this way mean that God doesn't want me to find him? Of course that would violate my belief that religion is crafted specifically to appeal to everyone, and such a victory of an altruistic God (imagine him choosing my happiness over the chance to gather more followers) over a pragmatic one would crush my disbelief, thereby removing my argument and therefore disproving God. Yes I just put you in a logical loop and no I will not help you back out.